Imaginary Friends by Nora Ephron

Author:Nora Ephron [Ephron, Nora]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: General, Literary Quarrels, Hellman; Lillian, Drama, American, Women Authors, McCarthy; Mary, Libel and Slander
ISBN: 9781400034222
Publisher: Vintage
Published: 2002-01-02T05:00:00+00:00

ACT 2

Scene 1

MARY and LILLIAN come onstage carrying their dolls and sit on the edge of the stage. Behind them is the fig tree and MARY’s house. MARY begins to sing “Imaginary Friend.”

MARY: [To her doll.]

I BELONG TO YOU

YOU BELONG TO ME

YOU PLAY MY FAV’RITE GAMES

NEVER CALL ME NAMES

NEVER DISAGREE

ALL THAT LONELY LONELINESS IS THROUGH

WITH AN IMAGINARY FRIEND

LIKE YOU

LILLIAN: [To her doll.]

WHAT WAS THAT YOU SAID?

YOU SAY THE SWEETEST THINGS

YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME BLUSH

WITH THE KINDA MUSH

YOUR DEVOTION BRINGS

CLOSE AS “A” WILL ALWAYS BE TO “B”

THAT’S MY IMAGINARY FRIEND

AND ME

LILLIAN AND MARY: [To their dolls.]

DANCIN’ WITH MY DOLLY DOWN A COUNTRY LANE

YOU’RE JUST PLAIN TRUE BLUE

SWEETER THAN THE CANDY OF A CANDY CANE

YOU REMAIN

IMAGINARY

MARY: [To her doll.]

I BELIEVE IN YOU

LILLIAN: [To her doll.]

I BELIEVE IN YOU

MARY:

YOU BELIEVE IN ME

LILLIAN:

YOU BELIEVE IN ME

LILLIAN AND MARY:

NICE OF YOU TO COME

YOU’LL BE TWEEDLEDUM

I’LL BE TWEEDLEDEE

WHEN I HAVE A THOUGHT, YOU’LL HAVE IT, TOO

YOU’RE MY IMAGINARY FRIEND

’MAGINARY FRIEND

LET IT NEVER END

LET IT NEVER END

’CAUSE I CAN DEPEND

YES I CAN DEPEND

ON—

DOLLS:

ON ME

WHEN WE GO OUT AND PLAY

LILLIAN AND MARY:

WHEN WE GO OUT AND PLAY

DOLLS:

YOU’RE ALWAYS ON MY SIDE

LILLIAN AND MARY:

ALWAYS ON MY SIDE

DOLLS:

YOU NEVER LET ME DOWN

NEVER SIT AND FROWN

NEVER MISS A STRIDE

LILLIAN AND MARY:

WITH ME STRIDE FOR STRIDE

DOLLS:

WHAT’S MORE FUN THAN MONKEYS IN THE ZOO?

LILLIAN AND MARY:

IT’S AN IMAGINARY FRIEND

ALL FOUR:

OR TWO

DANCIN’ WITH MY DOLLY DOWN A COUNTRY LANE

CLOUDS AND RAIN WON’T DO

LILLIAN AND MARY:

WAITIN’ FOR MY DADDY AT THE CHOO-CHOO TRAIN

ALL FOUR:

WE REMAIN

WE REMAIN

SO VERY MERRY

I BELONG TO YOU

YOU BELONG TO ME

SWEETER THAN A YAM

OR A JAR O’ JAM

AT A JAMBOREE

ICKY-WICKY THOUGHTS GO WICKY WOO

WITH AN IMAGINARY FRIEND

’MAGINARY FRIEND

LET IT NEVER END

LET IT NEVER END

’CAUSE I CAN DEPEND

YES I CAN DEPEND

YES I CAN DEPEND

UPON A FRIEND

IT’LL NEVER END

NOT WITH AN IMAGINARY FRIEND

LIKE YOU

MARY sits on the porch steps. UNCLE MYERS emerges from the house. He takes out a razor strop and flicks it against the porch railing with a sharp snap.

UNCLE MYERS: Mary—

MARY: Yes, Uncle—

UNCLE MYERS: I gave your brother a tin butterfly several days ago.

MARY: I know. From a Cracker Jack box. Will you get me one? Please? I would love one so much.

UNCLE MYERS: He can’t find it. Have you seen it anywhere?

MARY: No. So it’s lost?

UNCLE MYERS: Well, that all depends, doesn’t it.…

UNCLE MYERS flicks his strop against the railing again. Then he walks into the house. A beat. UNCLE MYERS comes back out of the house with the strop.

Mary—

MARY: Yes, Uncle—

UNCLE MYERS: Are you sure you haven’t seen the butterfly?

MARY: Of course I’m sure.

The door slams. MARY goes back to reading her book. The door opens. UNCLE MYERS comes back out and stands in the doorway.

UNCLE MYERS: Mary—

MARY: Yes, Uncle.

UNCLE MYERS: I found the butterfly.

MARY: Good.

UNCLE MYERS: Would you like to know where it was?

MARY: Where was it?

UNCLE MYERS: It was under your plate. Did you take your brother’s butterfly and hide it under your plate?

MARY: No.

UNCLE MYERS: Well, someone took your brother’s butterfly and hid it under your plate—

MARY: It wasn’t me. Why would I do that?

UNCLE MYERS:

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